Impressively bad.

My experience with O2 will be over soon after only two months in, but I thought I'd take the time to list how your company failed me with the hope that you will take it seriously and perhaps help the next people whom you sign up to your crappy service.

1. the connection speed.  On day one of my contract I received the advertised speed of 100 MB/s.  Since that day I have performed regular checks and it never again reached the dizzy heights of the advertised speed.  I understand that sometimes this will vary, but you have to admit it is incredibly suspicious that it is full speed on day one and then never again.  Most of the time it was around 25 MB/s, but during that last week it was 0.2 MB/s.  Yes, only 0.2% of the advertised speed.  This is just not good enough.
2. the O2 included modem.  This is a piece of locked down rubbish.  It does not support bridge mode.  You cannot even set your own IP range internally.  It makes you choose 192.168.x.x.  Each time I re-power it I have to find O2 supplied login information and type in the number to access the menus.
3. ability to connect my own equipment.  It took the best part of a month to extract a username and password from O2.  Could it be done via a phone call? No.  Could it be done via email? No.  It could only be managed by joining this discussion forum.  I mean, are you joking!  Then I had to join a discussion group and wait until the password gods managed to send a password.  Why is not given as part of the introduction pack?  Why did I have to work so hard to get a peice of information that I am entitled to get?
4. O2 forum help.  So where to start.  The forum operators are obtuse and indignant when they finally do answer.  They know that they have you at a disadvantage, so you have to grovel to get them to help.  I was unable to get basic information from them without knowing that they had the information first.  This forum and the other customers where usually of more assistance.  For instance I asked what settings the network was expecting, eg, PPoE or another, but I was told that I would not get help with my individual modem.  Huh.  Did I ask for help with my modem?  No, I asked for the network settings as determined by O2.
5. O2 telephone help.  As far as I am concerned, if anyone is able to speak English to me then I am extremely grateful.  I do not expect all people to speak it and if they do I thank them.  They were the people who enabled me to communicate in a foreign country.  They were the people who worked hard to learn a new language and succeeded.  Cheers, I raise my glass to you.  However, your operators need a new procedure for handling this because every time I called, I politely asked if they spoke English, there was a pause, then they hung up.  I stopped called after the forth time.  When I asked a German speaking colleague to call for me, he spoke to an operator who told me that I cannot connect my own equipment.  We ended the call and tried again. This time the information from O2 was that it was possible, but not yet - there is a new law coming soon! (this was my favourite answer)  The next day we tried again for yet another answer.  None of the operators said to join the forum and ask them for the login information.  This information was supplied by Google.
6. Website help.  Today I looked for 20 minutes trying to find out how to contact someone about my very low connection speed.  Then I asked a native German speaker to also look.  After another 20 minutes we made the determination that there was no way to contact O2 to get help for my simple problem.  I then went to the Internet, which I must do at work because my Internet speed is useless (0.2 MB/s for those who have forgotten the number) and joined another provider.  It took 10 minutes and they will send me the login information for my modem before the porting is complete.  Take note O2.

Well, that's all I can think of right now.  To everyone that was helpful to me I thank you.  To everyone else, I hope that you find the inner peace you require to learn that being helpful to others is a joy and not a burden.